Life happens, and sometimes the people we love hurt us. Breakups are part of life, but when you have invested time and energy in a relationship that ends sour, it can be rough moving forward.
Unlike physical pain, which has medicine that relieves the aches sometimes in minutes, healing mentally and emotionally is a process.
It takes time, and no one should rush you to be alright. Here are a few tips to help through the healing process of relationship pain.
Allow yourself to feel the pain
You need to allow yourself to feel the pain. Masking or ignoring it will not do you any good. You have been hurt and you have to let out your anger and frustration instead of bottling it up.
Acting like you haven’t been hurt does not last long. At one point, you will lose it and eventually have to admit that you are hurting and deal with the pain.
Take time to process
Depending on the magnitude of the pain, take all the time you need to heal. Do not be in a hurry to be okay. You cannot command your brain to be alright and yet you are stressed, disappointed, and in pain.
You matter and your life is yours to live. Take time to process and heal before thinking of a new prospect in the relationships area.
Learn to live with the pain
Sometimes we are unable to let go of the pain and have to learn how to live with it. As time passes by, the hurt does not sting as much as it used to in the beginning. Yes, there might be triggers around you but the more you encounter them, the better you become at managing them.
With time, you are able to live with the pain and handle the triggers. Do not be hard on yourself when it takes you a longer time to get a handle of your emotions. Healing has no constant time frame in which it must happen. Be patient with your mind and soul.
Don’t hurry to start a new relationship
Do not be in a hurry to get into a new relationship when hurting. You need to process what you have just been through and be alright before you invite someone else into your life.
Otherwise, you are going to carry unresolved issues into your new relationship and even end up hurting the other person knowingly or unknowingly.
Don’t settle for any suitor
Just because you feel lonely or yearn for affection does not mean you settle for any person who shows interest in you relationship-wise. In situations where you ignored those red flags (or you did not even know they were warning signs) and ended up with enormous pain, you cannot afford to make the same mistake.
At least take time to know someone better before making any decision. The last thing you need is to end up in the same mess that caused you so much pain. Don’t settle for anybody. You deserve better and to be treated right.
Pain is part of life and relationships can leave us scarred. Healing helps us move forward. Taking time to process painful emotions, learning to manage triggers, taking time to know someone better, and not settling for anybody can help you make better, informed decisions.